Looking To Tomorrow . . .

Today I wanted to do a lot but really spent two hours sitting in my car waiting on the mail because I had packages due.  She finally got here at 2:30.  Mother is in a piss poor mood so I get to deal with that on a daily basis.  It's like 90 degrees in here and she's freezing.  Something I am very weary of.  There is a lot around here I am very leery of.

In my packages, I got 3 books I ordered, only 1 I had to pay for and my color changing incense burner (it's really great!), and my plant I've been expecting.

So there's that.  I have to do some reorganizing in here I'm running out of space.  So much devoted to coloring and coloring supplies.  Books.  Dvds.  I'll figure something out.  Other things I have to figure out too while I'm at it.  We'll see.

Feeling A Little Beaten . . .

I have to do something and I have to meditate on it long and hard.  I've decided to leave the chatroom.  Really, I've decided not to be online so much at all starting tomorrow.  I have enough domestic chores to do around here to keep me busy all day every day and in my down time I can color, read and write.  It's what I need to be doing.  I'm being treated so poorly in chat there is no sense in my staying.  So I won't.  No more broadcasts either, although I will upload stuff to you tube.  Set up a scene outside, and use that as my studio and upload vids about herbs, crystals, hedgewitchery, and practical things for those new to the magickal arts.  I'll need to go to my you tube channel and fix that up, it'll need to be a playlist of its own.  Might even use the rbarcs youtube for it, just start all over again.  But that's not for right now.  Right now is for organizing, thinking things out, and doing what is good for ME and doing my own thing.  The group mentality always breaks down after a while, someone comes along that wants to be boss and they have this little teenybopper bitch that wants to be head keeper at the zoo and has it in for me in depth.  She must be cybersucking the cock of the owner.  But that's fine too, I noticed a lot of people are leaving some are coming to a couple of other chats I'm on as well, but, not enough.  The alternate chats are dead and boring.  I'll keep looking I may find one yet.

Another Loss ...

Rest in peace my little man.  We loved you so much and it's far too soon for you to leave us.  We will miss you so much baby.  Be happy and rest in peace.

Finally Fall!

Woke up today to thunder, it's been raining lightly on and off all day.  Cooling some, significantly starting Sunday and will be continuously cool.  50s for lows (some 40s!) and 70s for highs.  About time!  The rain will be good for the garden it's time for it to be watered.  First of the month I have to get another large heater for the living room.  Goddess help us with these breakers, it's worse in the winter.  Fortunately the robe I bought for Mother is really warm.  So that's good.  I intended to burn the old one before the rain but got lazy and didn't now I'll have to wait for it to dry before it will burn.

The leaves haven't really started to fall, perhaps they will, I love to burn leaves no better smell in the world!

Saturday . . .

Just got the race for tomorrow autotuned.  Talladega, there will be a "big one".  Today there is only a truck race, I guess I'll watch, nothing else on.

Need to wash again, sheets.  Uggh.  Will prolly take em out today wash tomorrow.  Today I have to do some grocery shopping.  I got my spider plant the other day but neglected to take it out soon enough and I think I killed it.  I watered it and put it on the porch in the sun, that might help.

A Very Nice Day ...

Got load one of laundry going that is some gowns, jeans, a blanket.  Load 2 will be mostly gowns and the capris I've been wearing, and my favorite orange shirt.  I need more tees.  More shirts, period.  So does Mother, I'll look at Amerimark and see what I can find.  They usually have good ones. Tomorrow I have to wash bed linens.  Mother's comforter and sheets and at least one of my comforters.

Problems Problems and More Problems . . .

I'm trying to get our televisions set up mine WAS working but now MOTHER'S is working and mine is not.  So until I figure out what fucked up from the time I left to go to the store to the time I got back she has tv and I don't.  I'm just fucking sick of this life I'm tired of everything going wrong I'm tired of all this being on MY SHOULDERS ALONE ... if I'd only known a long time ago things would have been done a WHOLE lot different but now everything is so locked up in chaos it cannot in the best of scenarios be fixed.